Long, Flowing Locks Descending From Your Taint

So I suppose I ought to write something here, huh. That's like what people do here, is write shit. Write. Like, words and such. Series of words all placed in a row, meant to, I dunno, what is this meant to do? What is this for? Learning? Laughing? Loving? I never know what to write, so more often than not I simply don't. I really am not one to put down the things that happen in my ever-so-exciting daily life. That shit is dull.

"I saw my friend Eric on the street as I was walking to class. I had my headphones on, so I believe he said 'Hello" but I honestly can't be 100% sure. Either way, I said 'Hello' in return, then I had to get to class. I was five minutes late already because I took a shit before class and it went a little longer than expected. It was good though, no recipricol issues and not a whole lot of leftovers. All in all, what a great day I had today. All the things I did today add up to a hearty bowl of soup known as life. And I lived it. Bam."

But that's what people do on blogs. You just write about shit that happened to you during the day, every day, for no real reason. Nobody cares. What you did was not as interesting as you think it was, and you don't even find it that interesting, trust me. On top of that, even if something exciting happened, I feel lame as fuck rushing back from it, excitement dripping from my pores, ready to shit it out into words so all can know the amazing thing I did.

"I went to a concert! Oh man, and there was music at this concert, and people performing the music! Oh, the fun that was had. If you were there you would know. You totally would know what I was talking about la la la! The music was music I liked, and I liked it! Quick, look up the artist name on Google so you can leave a comment that sounds like you know what I'm talking about!"

Again, that's all people do here. And I've never been a diary type person who catalouges events in their lives; it's depressing. I don't need a list of things I wasted my time on. Plus, even if I was having a good time, writing it here seems so... empty. Meaningless.

So what else do people write about? News events. But I've never felt the need to be a middleman to some news item you were already aware of. There are people for that, I'm not one of them. I hardly ever put links on my posts because it just doesn't feel right to act as a conduit for the diaper known as the internet. I hate the internet. Fuck you Facebook and fuck you MySpace and fuck you pornography (sorry sorry sorry, porn, I promise I'll come back around very soon) and fuck you everyone who spends their life sitting in front of a fucking screen (and yes that includes me).

So what does that leave me to write about? What I always write about: stupid shit. Silly observations and bitch-sessions, parodies and primevals. And sentences I like the sound of. Poetry and philosophy, comedy and anger. All at once. But often I have none of the above, so I go days stagnant. Should I feel compelled to write here? No. But I do. Why? Because it is one of the few things in life I actually enjoy doing.

And I don't have to get up to do it.