The Little Critters Of The World; They Don't Know That They're Ugly
As I'm walking down the street today, from the other end of the sidewalk this woman begins to stare at me. Oh god, I think. She's going to want to talk to me about something. Sure enough, as soon as I got within a reasonable proximity of her, she asked if I had a moment. I gave her my moment, not wanting to be a dick. She began to talk to me about Children International, a non-profit organization designed to try to improve children in third world country's standard of living. Now I'm all for this. But I'm in college. I don't have a job. All my money goes to eating. I like eating. It keeps me alive. Sorry to rub it in the faces of undernourished children, but I'm a middle class white man in America. I'm more important than you. So here I am in this conversation with this person, all the time realizing that it's not so much a conversation as it is me waiting for her to stop talking so I can say "No Thanks" or "I'm sorry, I have no money". Frankly, I found it hilarious. Don't get me wrong, the concept of hungry dying children only occasionally makes me chortle. It was more the realization that I was in this one-sided conversation with this person and I knew full well what my response was going to be. Somehow or another, here I was, being told information, that I was politely ignoring, as I knew where this was going to lead, by this person who I knew I was going to reject as soon as she finished speaking. I always have moments like this where I suddenly realize, almost from a third-person perspective, what is happening, and I usually find them simply comical. I couldn't help but laugh to myself. I tried my hardest to keep it to myself, because that would just be plain rude to laugh at this picture of an impoverished Mexican boy she showed me. But I found it laugh-out-loud hysterical. Because for some reason or another, this women picked me out specifically from the crowd to talk to. An entire crowd passed by as she stared me down. Why me? Do I look like I have money in my ratty faux-homeless-wear gray and black striped jacket with a broken zipper? If I were rich, I would gladly donate the 60 cents a day to these poor kids. But I'm not, and if I find 60 cents on the ground I scoop it up and horde it as much as humanly possible.
Being a person who talks to people on the street must be a difficult job. People are bound to give you shit all the time, and everyone is too cynical to really care that much about what you have to say. Life's a bitch, and I find that hilarious.
Being a person who talks to people on the street must be a difficult job. People are bound to give you shit all the time, and everyone is too cynical to really care that much about what you have to say. Life's a bitch, and I find that hilarious.
posted by MC Harv at 1:16 PM
4 Comments:
I've never had a problem with refusing to give money to people. It's not that I'm overly greedy, it's just that I've always thought there were better ways to help most times than throwing money at the problem. I mean, wouldn't it be better if that person was out lobbying or getting a petition signed to actually aleviate the problems that create starving children?
I've always found it ironic that Catholic charities that work to feed the poor in the third-world are the same people that advocate the destruction of family planning. Ugh.
She picked you because she thought you would care enough to give. forgetting that most people that HAVE enough to give, aren't walking the street. It's her way of feeling like she's doing something, without really doing anything. Then again, I think those pictures are comical too; they're just too sad and adorable looking.
-Thomas
Oh fuck, you must have one of those faces. I have one of those faces. You think it's a pain in the ass when you don't have money, just wait until you do. Forgo school for a semester and get plastic surgery, quick!
Once there was this blind lady on the promenade who was panhandling from a wheelchair. I felt sorry for her, so i gave her a whole dollar. But she didn't give me a thanks or anything, she didn't even acknowledge my presence. So fuck that, I took it right back out of the cup. So what if she was blind, that'll show these unthankful bums.
Of COURSE I have one of hose pleading, "help me, I'm like Bambi," faces, who doesn't? That's why those pictures are ridiculous because when you put that face on, it's to wheedle somethiing out of somebody else. I think most of them are staged anyway, so what eva.
-Thomas
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