I Missed My Stop At Hullaballoo Station
I swear to fucking Christ, if it was one of you motherfuckers that live with me that did this I am going to take a fucking Mexican-food dump on your brand-new couch and spread it around with the stream of my urine. Then I will get Tammy Faye to fucking menstrual bleed in your mouth while you sleep. You flabby bastard cunts.
I can't officially blame my roommates I guess, but I'm going to. Here I am, 2 in the morning, I'm fucking tired as hell seeing as how I have slept very little this past week. I planned to slip under the covers, nice and warm, read my book and gently drift off to sleep. It was going to be glorious.
BUT THERE IS A GIGANTIC FUCKING PUDDLE IN THE MIDDLE OF MY BED.
All caps is not a highly looked-upon way to write text, I understand, but this is how I am saying these words. FUCK. It doesn't smell like urine, and I certainly didn't even have a chance to pee in my bed since last time I was in it. I some fucking racehorse needed a place to rest between laps he could've used my roommates fucking mothers vag. I don't need this shit.
It rained. Maybe it is spill-over from the rain, he says in his head. Yeah fucking right, rain poured in through the window, underneath three sets of blankets and managed to get nowhere else but on the bed. This shit seems deliberate. I am pissed. Feel my vein.
I fucking hate the world right now, especially since I can see the laughter in my god damn asshole roommates face as he tells me it was him and fucking proud of his little joke was. Well, let me tell you something, cock: Pranks such as these can be funny to those WHO ARE FRIENDS. We are not friends anymore. Any semblance of good attitude I had toward you is now officially out the fucking window along with your fucking ball sack if I hear you laughing about your exploits in the morning. Fuck you with all my heart and soul. Sincerily.
I'm not saying my roommates did it officially or even what the fuck it is, but no matter what I am fucking pissed as your geriatric cooter, and if these assholes think this shit is funny I am going to chop their fucking faces off and feed them to their assholes. I am not amused and you are not my friends. FUCK YOU.
(If you didn't do it, apologies. But I'm saying fuck you anyway because I am in hate with the Earth right now and want to watch it burn. Am I overreacting? Fuck you too.)
I can't officially blame my roommates I guess, but I'm going to. Here I am, 2 in the morning, I'm fucking tired as hell seeing as how I have slept very little this past week. I planned to slip under the covers, nice and warm, read my book and gently drift off to sleep. It was going to be glorious.
BUT THERE IS A GIGANTIC FUCKING PUDDLE IN THE MIDDLE OF MY BED.
All caps is not a highly looked-upon way to write text, I understand, but this is how I am saying these words. FUCK. It doesn't smell like urine, and I certainly didn't even have a chance to pee in my bed since last time I was in it. I some fucking racehorse needed a place to rest between laps he could've used my roommates fucking mothers vag. I don't need this shit.
It rained. Maybe it is spill-over from the rain, he says in his head. Yeah fucking right, rain poured in through the window, underneath three sets of blankets and managed to get nowhere else but on the bed. This shit seems deliberate. I am pissed. Feel my vein.
I fucking hate the world right now, especially since I can see the laughter in my god damn asshole roommates face as he tells me it was him and fucking proud of his little joke was. Well, let me tell you something, cock: Pranks such as these can be funny to those WHO ARE FRIENDS. We are not friends anymore. Any semblance of good attitude I had toward you is now officially out the fucking window along with your fucking ball sack if I hear you laughing about your exploits in the morning. Fuck you with all my heart and soul. Sincerily.
I'm not saying my roommates did it officially or even what the fuck it is, but no matter what I am fucking pissed as your geriatric cooter, and if these assholes think this shit is funny I am going to chop their fucking faces off and feed them to their assholes. I am not amused and you are not my friends. FUCK YOU.
(If you didn't do it, apologies. But I'm saying fuck you anyway because I am in hate with the Earth right now and want to watch it burn. Am I overreacting? Fuck you too.)
posted by MC Harv at 2:14 AM
5 Comments:
SHUT THE FUCK UP
Has the mystery been solved? My apologies.
--Eva
revenge is always fun.
It's always pills with you innit?
hey, I identify, nobody wants to sleep in th wet spot. that's why we always have sex on my husband's side of the bed.
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