I Have Not Had The Internet

The internet, she does not work. She does not work, you see. Oh on these tepid September days no light doth beacon me. Achewood and news I cannot check, nor e-mails can I proscribe. Pornography has left my reach, this blog has all but died. Homework, if I may opine, relies too much on web sites, has been a hassle and a hell as the net doth read its death rites. Luddite, I, and sympathizers rage against machines, yet who among us hasn't found a need for these retched fiends? I type to you today amidst librarians and students, cursing the name of the internet, my language at its crudest. It is now the third week sans this blasted technology; the Comcast guy's a dicklick and has yet to acknowledge me. Shit doth piss one the fuck off, I scream and rave and rant. I simply wish to look up the bus line, yet find I simply can't. I know at one time the whole world survived without computers, but this shit has become a drug and I've become a user.

So fuck the internet anyway, yeah, fuck it all to hell. I'll get by as best I can, I guess it's just as well.

Tan Horse Debacle

Oh my. Oh geez. Oh boy. Once again I have proven myself quite the sluf-a-bed-a-bout by not posting on here for these lo fifteen years, six months, four days and nine hours. Oh my. This tends to happen to me over the summer, as this blog is intended primarily to distract me from my schoolwork, of which there is none for a good three months. I do my best to be diligent and find some dumb topic to be stupid about, but most of the time ain't nothing worthy of talking about comes up. I am quite bad at figuring out topics to write about, mainly because I refuse to pull a typical blogger plop of "This Is What I Done Be Did'd Today" and the like. For those of us who live maliciously uninteresting lives, I am often at a loss for words. People tend to ask me things like "How was your summer?" at the beginning of the school year and I find myself with little else to say other than "Uh... How was yours?" Perhaps this is the sign of a man who ought not to be blogging. Blaaaaawwwwggggging. There's too many G's in blogging. Maybe I've gone over that before.

Anyhow, I guess I moved into a nice apartment with my girlfriend. That's pretty nifty. I'm excited to live in this place and excited for the new year, but still finding myself at a trademark loss of words. I have a sort of strange approach to writing, I guess. I feel off writing Thank You notes, letters to grandparents, birthday cards and in yearbooks, the typical places most non-writers write, but I can spout your damn ear off about cereal or the sign above my apartment that squeaks. Though as of now I am in the mood to do neither. I also feel the need to entertain with this little space and thus far, I'm sure, I'm doing a pretty crappy job with this missive.

Maybe all I'll say for now is this is the beginning of my (hopefully) last year in college, I hope to have lots to say through this year, and I hope some semi-interesting things happen to me.

Okay.